Maybe if we all gang up on him... SHIT! He got better!
I think I'm going to try to finish my world-destroying machine this weekend, assuming I get my day off.
Of course, I have laundry that needs to be laundered, sleep that needs to be slept, and a general major cleanup so that I can do a minor cleanup when I get "the call" and pretend that I do, in fact, not live in a place that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles would find homey.
And I'm suddenly inexplicably ravenous for pizza. Hmmm.
As every one of my inventions has had in the past, this one will need a name. Much thanks to One Who Shall Not Be Named At This Point Until They Tell Me It's Okay for steering me to a webcomic that inspired the naming of the latest machine.
Gentlebeings, lesbians, and otaku of all kinds, I give you:
The Voodoo Gimp Stick.
Be afraid. It will beat you down.
Of course, I have laundry that needs to be laundered, sleep that needs to be slept, and a general major cleanup so that I can do a minor cleanup when I get "the call" and pretend that I do, in fact, not live in a place that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles would find homey.
And I'm suddenly inexplicably ravenous for pizza. Hmmm.
As every one of my inventions has had in the past, this one will need a name. Much thanks to One Who Shall Not Be Named At This Point Until They Tell Me It's Okay for steering me to a webcomic that inspired the naming of the latest machine.
Gentlebeings, lesbians, and otaku of all kinds, I give you:
The Voodoo Gimp Stick.
Be afraid. It will beat you down.
posted by Rimmy at 17:48
8 Comments:
Note that even after all of you had computers that surpassed my own, it didn't do a lick of good. Should have spent that upgrade money on frag lessons from me. ;)
I've thought a lot about why I didn't die more when you guys ganged up on me. And it comes down to a couple of things:
1) Sometimes you guys would use the *worst* weapons! I moved in a jerky pattern, or in smooth low-trajectory ballistic arcs, so if you were sniping I was near-impossible to headshot. Or, sometimes you guys would use something like an rpg, which not only warns me with the red dot, it tells me where you are. Never good. ;)
2) The other thing was that I think you guys couldn't run/duck/jump/dodge/strafe and keep your weapon trained on me. However, I could. Hence the "Er, we ambushed him, why are WE dead?" and the general level of frustration coming from your most frequent partner. :)
Note that the aforementioned partner actually beat me in either a perfect or perfect minus one game of one-on-one Action Half-Life once. And never played me again. It was astonishing, and I enjoyed myself immensely. ;)
I've been beaten (in the game, dweeb) a few other times, most notably by someone who "trained" under me and was possibly the finest fragger behind me. Innovative, random, and a good damn shot.
We'll have to hook up a remote game for all of us sometime, schedules and interest permitting. ;)
I think that would b a splended Idea...altho I don't know if my machine could run the new half life all that well....there is always the first one :) meeeeeeeeeeeeeemories" :)
Just turn down the details and pick something that explodes. It'll all work out. ;)
lol Craig
There WAS a use for your optical-mouse-stuck-on-the-wood-grain piroutte - it made me laugh so hard that I couldn't bring myself to shoot you.
Of course, surrounding you with laser trip mines so that when you pulled out of the spin you'd die anyway... that I could still do. ;)
Yeah, some of you guys did seem to get pretty excited while firing, and there was much friendly fire. I always resented that, as I'd rather have had the shots coming towards ME. Case in point:
One time on one of our common levels, I ran into a room as Ark came down the elevator. I let him unload his 50-round mp5 while I stood about two game meters in front of him, just jigging from side to side, ducking, and jumping. Barely nicked my armor.
My crowbar smashed his pumpkin though. w00t!
Gah, I'm an arrogant bastard. Watch my skills be all eroded. :P
So I'm thinking to myelf, wow, I can see the beginning and the end on one screen! I don't need to nap between paragraphs! And then what do I find? That you've left a comment that's even longer than your post. :)
You truly are one of a kind.
Craig - I'M the one guarding the gates of heaven, and God can't get past me to pick up a decent weapon. So keep practicing. ;)
Jay - you're one to talk. You inspired 24 comments with your blowjob post. That waaaaay outclasses any minor comment I might leave, blowjob related or not. :)
Tursi here :)
I have finally caught up with comments for this year - my god you write a lot! Finally something to read when all else seems dead!
So this reply has nothing to do with THIS post.
Glad you liked Naruto - I am reminded to get discs made up for you and my brother and ship them off. ICQ me your mailing address sometime.
The visit was fine and despite some of the odd conversations, I was not disappointed or distressed, and certainly never bored. It was nice to see Zissou with someone capable of being as baffled by it as myself. And while some of the facts passed on to me were things I'd never think to ask about, Knowledge is Power! >:)
S'anyway, we'll hang out again sometime.
Tursi - yeah, I'm a yappy bastard. I don't really pay attention as I type here, and I usually post when I'm tired so it just sort of pours out of my fingers like an extended sneeze and the rest of you get to read the splatter. :P
Naruto was great - I just wish I'd been able to stay awake to see more and to clearly remember anything other than the ninja that couldn't disguise himself worth shit. Expect that you WILL get my mailing address mailed to you. :)
As for the knowledge - now you know how to help Scooby Doo and the gang when they take on the case of the re-junkie. :P
And I hope Zissou didn't turn you off trying to watch the Royal Tannenbaums (possible spelled wrong). THAT was a much better version of this movie, although it's set in a house instead of on a boat.
We'll have to hang out sooner, and hopefully I can make some of the effort to bring that about. :)
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