Gypsy don't surf

So for the first time in two weeks, I didn't wear those ankle weights on my walk to work. It was raining, and since they're full of sand I didn't want to find out the hard way that the material wasn't waterproof, and end up with sacks of leaking mud all over my pants.

It turns out that I do, in fact, walk much faster and with a springier step than with those two five-pound buggers on my feet. Whoo hoo, progess!

Once I threaded the dealers and hopped a train, I pulled out my book and passed the time in the usual way, except that at the very next stop something in the periphery caught my eye, and I had to look.

I should mention at this point that a friend of mine just recently discovered Chris Rock's "Never Scared", and has been enjoying it. So I went back and watched it again.

And damned if this slightly over-upholstered blond with the lowcut top and the short skirt wasn't wearing clear heels. Clear heels!

My objectivity was out the window, and I tried to block out that sardonic voice echoing around in my head.

At least I didn't start performing his stuff out loud! I think I deserve a cookie. ;)

At work I managed to irritate the Romanian. I almost felt bad for him, since lately with his relentlessly excessive anti-Jewish program, he's definitely been getting on my pecks, but I notice that didn't stop me from continuing to push when I saw him withdraw and go into a slow burn.

When the usual tea/hot chocolate time came around, they phoned me to let them into the cafeteria so I finished my rounds and went down and met them.

As an aside, we all tend to talk pretty loudly at this site. When a large building is empty, it's an easy thing to do. And you tend to (unconsiously I assume) scale your hearing to accomodate that. However, as I was approaching the door, I overheard the Romanian and DiceGimp talking:

"Okay, so when he opens the door we'll start. Ready?"

"Dude, I am so ready."

Sigh. I opened the door and they immediately launched into a discussion as though they were in mid-sentence when I arrived.

"So as you can see, despite the deliberate suppression of facts and misrepresentation in the west, Hitler actually did more good for Germany, and Europe in general, than he did bad."

"Oh, I totally agree. I've been reading Mein Kamph and find that Hitler..."

You get the gist.

So after putting up with it through most of my cup of tea, I flipped it around and dug at him for being a gypsy. You might remember that last winter I made the joke that since gypsy = Romani, that Romani must equal Romanian. And he was pissed off. So I dusted that chestnut out and let fly. He was pretty good about it at first, but it was late in his shift, and late at night, and he kept mispeaking.

Even better, DiceGimp took it up (innocently, because it was funny sounding) and the Romanian started to get defensive and mispoke even more.

When he finally shrugged and said something like "I'm just how I am", with his accent it sounded like "I'm Hawaiian". So I went with it.

He then mispoke again about Romania invading Russia after the second world war, so I ended up painting this garish, ridiculous scenario of a bunch of gypsies surfing over the snow into Moscow, using their headscarves to keep the spray from beading up on their crystal balls, all the while dancing and juggling and doing acrobatics.

Man, he was in a slow burn. He was desparately trying to explain to DiceGimp that "Gypsies are a different race, they're from India! They immigrate around!"

But DiceGimp was too entertained by the rapidly expanding gypsy-surfer scenario.

The Romanian especially didn't like that I said "Hey, didn't you immigrate here? GYPSY! GYPSY!" while pointing at him accusingly.

"This is why I hate this country. Nobody here is educated on basic world facts" he said, and sat back to sulk and generally be unresponsive.

Of course, we didn't need him by that point. Kowabunga, dude!

Too bad I won't get to see him for four days - I hope I don't forget to flog him with this whenever the antisemitism starts up. ;)

Tonight though, Buffalo Kisser is on. I'll have to explain to him that the woman whose eyes freaked him out so much on the SkyTrain the other night was just because she had one squinty eye, and one glass one.

But he was horrified and fascinated. It was pretty comical, actually. Especially when I struck up a conversation with her and she turned out to be security, for the same company as all of these nuts I post about!

I would have dug to find out what her weirdism is, but my stop came up and I had to leave. Ah well.

I started writing this entry early in the afternoon, but I had a nap and then later a game with Depaxus. But just shortly before I finished, She called me.

She said hi, asked if I was busy, and said that she was just calling to let me know that she has a number that she could be reached at, and would I like to know it?

With absolutely no malice, I said "I don't know if I do."

I went on to say that since it hasn't really worked out so well when I've initiated conversations with her lately, what would she even want me to call her about? I couldn't even imagine what I'd say.

She got upset, and said "Well if that's the way you see things, forget I called." Click.

Sigh. Does it really have to be like this?